Gloomy Wednesday

Wednesday, December 12, 2012

First off let me apologize. This might not be the most positive blog post but I think It'll help me feel a lot better to write out how I'm feeling.

You may have read about it in my last post but I have felt incredibly sick off and on for the past year but even more so the past couple of months. I try my best to put on a smile and act like I'm just fine but I've never been in so much pain in my life. I have shooting pains in my pelvic area, my stomach is nauseous and bloated, my back aches like I've been kicked by a horse, and my entire body is just tired and achey.

I was suppose to get surgery done yesterday to remove the endometriosis and ruptured ovarian cysts but the hospital called me 2 hours before the surgery and told me my insurance hadn't approved the surgery. I am double covered with insurance so I didn't understand how that was possible. Turns out being double insured bit me in the butt!

I'm still insured under my parent's and since I've had that longer than my husband's insurance that is my primary insurance. The hospital that the surgery was to be done at is under my husband's insurance. My husband's insurance wouldn't pay for the surgery because my parent's insurance is the primary. My parent's insurance wouldn't drop me off their plan until the end of the year. My doctor only has the rights to do the surgery at the hospital that my husband's insurance covers so I was out of luck. I could have still had it done under my parent's insurance but I would have to pay the out of pocket deductible before they would cover anything. The deductible is over $7,000. Just a liiiiitle out of my budget.

So my doctor put me on some heavy narcotics which don't allow me to drive so I am stuck at home waiting it out until the New Year when my husband's insurance will become my primary insurance. Let's just say I am going crazy, I feel so unfulfilled. I feel like I haven't been able to do anything productive lately and it makes me feel completely worthless.

I also need to write two review posts for some products that I was given in the mail. The last thing I want to do is have my picture taken. Why can't my organs just heal themselves? HA! :)

My goal this week is to work on being more positive. What tricks do you have to keep from feeling gloomy? I know this could be a LOT worse. So I'm incredibly thankful for that. I really do have so many blessings and I try my best to always remind myself of those things.

32 comments:

  1. i HATE insurance. I hate it so much. its awful and I am so sorry. it's so unfair, It makes me livid! i truly understand what it feels like dealing with it, so if you ever need to vent I am here. It is hard to stay positive but I know you will because you are an amazing person.

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  2. i really hope you start feeling better. feeling less than 100% is never good, but right around the holidays just makes it that much worse! and what a terrible situation with the insurance. you would think the double coverage would have helped. so stupid! sending positive thoughts your way!

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  3. insurance is causing so many problems for me too. right now I'm pregnant and uninsured (although I'm supposed to have insurance and its a long story...) so yeah, i can kind of understand! I'm really sorry!

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    1. Oh my goodness! I can't even imagine. I'm sure you are so stressed out right now, I'm so sorry! :(

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  4. Let's be honest, some people wouldn't even bother reading this post but I love it, it makes you human to have these days where you just need to get things off your chest. I'm truly sorry you're in so much pain, the bright side is this year is almost over, and it's not October or November. I know that doesn't make it any better but it's a plus. At least you don't have to wait months for your parents insurance to drop you.

    As for things to keep you from feeling gloomy look for things positive! Look up inspiring quotes or testimonies. Look for things that you know will brighten your mood.

    Early this morning I found a blog that she works for a company that is helping children in need have something for Christmas. It brightened my day to know that there are people out there that still care and that are truly humble. In this hateful world, that's something that always puts a smile on my face. (If you want to know a little bit more about the cause I posted about it on kcandbecca.blogspot.com or you can go to www.InstaClaus.com, it's fabulous and will brighten your day!)

    Hope this helps at least in the slightest!

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    1. Thank you so much for this, Becca! Those are some really great ideas. Thanks so much for taking the time to read about all my whining. ;)

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  5. i hate insurance issues, seriously. luckily my husband is still on his parents, he has type 1 diabetes, so everything is ridiculously expensive. so i hope things get better!

    ill come visit you and bring you soup, would that help!
    i think listening to music and then if you can find craft to do that could help as well!

    hope things get better soon, but really, i mean it.

    K

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    1. Oh man. That is such a blessing that he is able to stay on there. I'm sure that helps a ton! Thank you so much for the offer. You are such a sweet girl and I'm so glad we've become friends through blogging! :)

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  6. I am SO sorry. Insurance is such a pain in the butt. I had to deal with it with COBRA betweeen jobs and then when I went on maternity leave. Stinks.

    Praying that you heal FAST.

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    1. Oh gosh Cobra is such a pain in the butt. I couldn't even imagine dealing with that on maternity leave, yikes!!

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  7. Oh my goodness, I'm so sorry to hear that! Insurance can be so helpful but so stinkin' hard to deal with!! Sorry that it has to happen right around the holidays but hopefully this last month will go by quickly and you can get the relief you need!

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  8. Health care in this country is a crime. Unbelievable...
    Hang in there ~ Here's to a healthy new you in the new year!

    Lanaya
    www.raising-reagan.com

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  9. Medical insurance issues are the worst! I am so sorry you're dealing with all of this, and have to put up with so much pain! Sending lots of hugs your way my dear :) And your earrings are on their way too.. If that helps any ;)

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  10. Sorry to hear you are in so much pain! :( That is just awful. Hope your Christmas is happy and helps time move quickly for you. Have you done all your Christmas shopping? That could help pass time and make you feel productive. I've done almost all of mine online this year... you don't even have to change out of your sweats :) I read a few blogs of mothers of terminally ill children...and even though they are sooooooo sad and painful, they really keep me focused on how good I have it and to appreciate every minute. Hope you get to feeling better and your surgery gets here before you know it! :)

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  11. I'm sorry to hear you are in so much pain and have to wait it out. At least you have some drugs to help you feel better.. I've never heard of being double insured biting you in the butt, but apparently it does happen! Ouch. $7k is a wee bit of money. At least you get a lot of time to relax and you can lounge around in sweat pants! You also have more time for blogging! Maybe do some crafts around the house.. that always helps me :D

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  12. I'm so sorry, friend! Insurance is the worst! :(
    I know what it's like to sit at home and be so bored and unfilfilled. Praying for you!!

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  13. Hey! Found your blog through the Blog Working Wednesdays blog hop! I'm a new follower...come check out my blog if you want :)

    lolalucy09.blogspot.com

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  14. So sorry you feel bad and love your real posts!!! Its life ya know so blog it. My prayers are with you, hang in there!!!

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  15. Ugh! INSURANCE! :( When I was 7 months pregnant, I got a letter from my OB office that they were dropping my insurance company (or something, maybe vice versa) and I'd have to find a new doctor. OMG. I lost it. Thankfully, it fizzled and I didn't have to, but SUCH stress! :( I'm sorry you're having troubles. :(

    Gloomy days are so hard. :( I say...chocolate, lots of it! :)

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  16. Sorry to hear about your troubles!! I hope that you are able to get through the next little while without much suffering and that the surgery is able to go off without a hitch after the new year! It's things like this that make me really grateful to be Canadian and not have to worry about having a way to pay for a necessary surgery like this.

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  17. Oh my gosh Kel. I am SO praying for you! I am so sorry. I can't even imagine. Health insurance is a NIGHTMARE. We have gone through like three different insurances in the last six months. It's so annoying. There is no reason for it to be as hard and expensive as it is. I hope that by some miracle, you don't have to wait until New Years!...and I hope you find SOME relief from the pain! Wish I lived close so I could bring you treats and movies! :)

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  18. Newest follower! Found you through Isalnd Livin' with One Haole Girl.
    Hopefully I can get back here soon to look around some more. :)

    ~Kindra
    Trying To Be Who I Am

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  19. Hi sweet girl! So sorry to hear about the trouble you're having... I have lots of tips on my blog about positivity ;) I know the insurance/hospital stuff can be a real pain, so unfortunate that our system is so broken. Things will get better! Xo, your newest follower, Margaret

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  20. I'm so sorry to hear about all your insurance problems. That's so horrible. They should do what they can to make sure you are healthy. Luckily, the end of the year is coming fast! :)

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  21. OH man, what a tough situation! Whenever I feel gloomy I just focus on what I have to be grateful for and remember that even though it seems like it couldn't get any worse... It could and for a lot of people it is. My heart goes out to you!!

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  22. OMG you poor thing!!! I couldn't even imagine! I hate insurance stuff. It's never ever there when we really need it! Since you're stuck at home maybe try a new TV series? Something to get your mind off everything else! Hang in there, you're one tough girl! XO

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  23. I hate to read this, I know how painful that crap is. I've had 3 different surgeries for mine so far. I pray yours goes smoothly and you get back to feeling GREAT! Insurance is a pain in the BUTT!!! So glad I found your blog, it's cool finding someone who is going through the same stuff.

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  24. Oh man, that's got to be so hard to be waiting like that! Insurance can be so annoying--but hey, you got to be grateful that you do have it and that eventually you can get the surgery without going into debt for it. My husband sees so many people at the hospital get into debt or go bankrupt because they needed emergency surgery and didn't have insurance that covered it. Annoying insurance is better than none!

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  25. Oh my goodness this is something we brits rarely read about due to the NHS. We just take for granted that its there for us. However, if we were booked in for non emergency surgery the likely hood is that we would be admitted then we would be told the operation was cancelled. You hear about it all the time here in the UK the NHS is notorious for it, and its so often old people so sad. Hope you get it sorted and feel better soon

    http://chandodaddy.blogspot.co.uk

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  26. Sending good vibes your way, hoping that you are feeling better soon! I'm not going to say that I know what you are going through because I don't - I suffered with ovarian cysts after my first pregnancy (they are annoying and painful at times) and recently had a bout with Pelvic Inflammatory Disease (which landed me in the ER receiving IV fluids and antibiotics via shot in the butt), but I understand that every person's experience is different! May you find comfort in the days to come until the New Year rings in and you can have the procedure that will heal things! <3

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  27. One day at a time, sweetie. One day at a time.
    Merry Christmas!
    xoxo
    Sierra
    Oh, Just Living the Dream

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